AUSTIN, Texas — Slender as a runway model, the new fall TV season arrives this month, officially kicking off with the Emmy Awards on Sept. 21 on ABC.
As you might have heard by now, the lingering effects of the Hollywood writers strike shot a hole in the spring development season, which is why we'll see fewer new shows this fall. Last fall we had nearly 30 new series on the major broadcast networks; this time around we have 20, including an entirely new night of programming (Sundays) by the CW.
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The fall premieres, usually trumpeted with a humongous hype-fest, are uncharacteristically subdued this time. Contributing to the low-impact premieres is the absence of information about them.
Only CBS sent out screeners to TV critics during the summer. Fox and ABC sent one or two, but NBC sent none. Does that mean the new shows are so horrible that the networks don't want them reviewed? Maybe, but it's more likely that production delays simply made previews impossible. Rumor has it that a few new shows haven't even been edited yet.
So though we cannot offer recommendations and grades for the newcomers now, we can provide descriptions and opine on the few shows we managed to grab in advance. From this limited perspective, it appears that drama continues to dominate comedy, and whimsy and sci-fi elements infuse most of the dramas. Whether any of them will be compelling enough for appointment viewing — or even full-season recording — remains to be seen.
As always, the premiere dates are subject to change, and a few favorites, such as Fox's "24" and "American Idol," will not return until midseason.
ABC
`Opportunity Knocks,' 7 p.m. CT Tuesdays (Sept. 23)
Actor-turned-executive producer Ashton Kutcher persuaded ABC to pick up this new reality show. A mobile TV truck roams America, pulling into random driveways to grill family members on how well they know each other. Think "Newlyweds" family-style. Furniture, big-screen TVs and cold cash will be awarded.
`Life on Mars,' 9 p.m. Thursdays (Oct. 9)
Based on a BBC series, the American version, from veteran writer-creators David E. Kelley and Thomas Schlamme, stars Irish actor Jason O'Mara as a modern-day cop who is transported back to 1973, with all of its bad hair and scary fashions, after a car crash. How will the poor dude function without cellphones and computers? Promos look good, but clips can be deceiving. And haven't we already seen a couple of time-traveling detectives?
CBS
`Worst Week,' 8:30 p.m. Mondays (Sept. 22)
Saw it, loved it. Sitcoms have been so bad for so long that I had zero expectations for this one. But seconds after the opening credits rolled, I was howling like a hyena. Kyle Bornheimer stars as well-meaning but totally hapless Sam. Bad luck follows him like a starving puppy. Engaged to his pregnant girlfriend Melanie (Erinn Hayes), he desperately tries to win over his future in-laws (comedy veterans Kurtwood Smith and Nancy Lenehan), but he arrives in a trash-bag diaper at their house, ruins a marinating goose and mistakenly declares the head of the household dead, which he wasn't. Can this fast-paced hilarity be sustained? We hope so, because we can all use a good belly laugh.
`The Mentalist,' 8 p.m. Tuesdays (Sept. 23)
Australian Simon Baker played "The Guardian" on CBS a few years ago and definitely has a following. In this light-hearted crime drama, he plays a fake psychic-turned-police consultant whose keen powers of observation help crack big cases. Some colleagues resent his presence; others are amused and amazed. Baker has a charming presence, but the pilot proved unremarkable.
`Gary Unmarried,' 7:30 p.m. Wednesdays (Sept. 24)
Saw it; hated it. Jay Mohr has never been funny, and he continues his streak as a divorced father of two whose ex-wife (Paula Marshall) is dating their marriage counselor. Are you laughing yet? I didn't think so.
`Eleventh Hour,' 9 p.m. Thursdays (Oct. 9)
Fine pedigree, intriguing star, totally strange pilot. Based on a BBC miniseries by sci-fi author Stephen Gallagher, the drama from Jerry Bruckheimer stars Rufus Sewell ("The Illusionist") as a biophysicist who is called in at the last minute (yep, the eleventh hour) to help U.S. authorities thwart potential scientific horrors such as human cloning. The pilot turned annoyingly preachy at the end.
`The Ex List,' 8 p.m. Fridays (Oct. 3)
When I confessed to colleagues in Los Angeles that I actually liked this show, the news spread and I was banned from polite society. Sexist? Maybe. Funny? Definitely. Elizabeth Reaser (Ava on "Grey's Anatomy") turns what could have been an unsympathetic role into a winner. She plays Bella, a thirtysomething businesswoman pining for marriage. After a psychic tells her that her soul mate is someone she's already dated and dumped, she begins searching through her exes in the hope of rekindling. Why has CBS buried this show on Friday nights? Maybe because the network assumes sympathetic souls will be home watching. But lots of people — married and single — just might enjoy this romantic comedy.
NBC
`My Own Worst Enemy,' 9 p.m. Mondays (Oct. 13)
As previously mentioned, NBC's shows weren't completed in time for preview, but if you saw the network's coverage of the Beijing Olympics you might feel like you already know all about this self-described "thriller." Christian Slater stars as two men in one body: Henry, a middle-class suburban family guy, and Edward, a secret agent who speaks a dozen languages and is trained to kill — with his teeth. Sounds interesting on paper, looks good in clips.
`Knight Rider,' 7 p.m. Wednesdays (Sept. 24)
Suspicions abound regarding this update of the 1980s David Hasselhoff series. Does anybody really care about a high-tech car that now can change shape and color? In the original series the car named KITT (Knight Industries Three Thousand) was a Pontiac Firebird Trans Am. The new vehicle is a Mustang, and the new man in charge of this va-rooming weapon is played by newcomer Justin Bruening.
`Kath & Kim,' 7:30 p.m. Thursdays (Oct. 9)
Troubled from the get-go, this new sitcom, based on an Australian show, has gone through more script and production revisions than any other fall series. But hope abounds because Molly Shannon, who honed her comedic skills on "Saturday Night Live," stars as Kath, a fortysomething divorced woman whose self-absorbed daughter Kim (Selma Blair) moves back home when her own marriage crumbles. Mother-daughter hilarity? Maybe.
`Crusoe,' 7 p.m. Fridays (two-hour series premiere 7 p.m. Oct. 17)
A total mystery, except for gorgeous snippets of lovely beaches and well-chiseled Philip Winchester as the young hero of Daniel Defoe's classic adventure novel. NBC media material describes the series as "equal parts `MacGyver,' `Castaway' and `Pirates of the Caribbean.' " I'm not feeling it, but who knows?
FOX
`Fringe,' 8 p.m. Tuesdays (two-hour series premiere 7 p.m. Tuesday)
Much anticipation surrounds this new sci-fi series, because it springs from the fertile imagination of J.J. Abrams ("Lost," "Alias"). The first few minutes of the pilot indeed were thrilling: Passengers on a plane succumb to some horrifying ailment, melting and splattering all over the place. FBI agent Olivia Dunham (impressive newcomer Anna Torv) and her partner/secret lover (Mark Valley) arrive to investigate. The search for answers leads Olivia to a brilliant but deranged doctor (John Noble) and his estranged and cagey son (Joshua Jackson). But the initial excitement deteriorates into a silly story involving LSD, mind-reading, terrorism and sensory deprivation tanks. If you thought you were lost in "Lost," wait till you get a load of this.
`Do Not Disturb,' 8:30 p.m. Wednesdays (Wednesday)
Saw it; hated it. An unfunny sitcom set in an allegedly chic New York hotel populated by tiresome stereotypes: a pseudo-suave manager who's not nearly as cool as he thinks (Jerry O'Connell), a wisecracking African-American staffer who tries to keep his ego in check (Niecy Nash), etc., etc., etc. A lot of people parade through, most of them regulars, and all are loud and cartoonish.
The CW
`In Harm's Way,' 5:30 p.m. Sundays (series premieres 6 p.m. Sept. 21)
A self-described "documentary" about dangerous jobs. Not previewed.
`Surviving Suburbia,' 6:30 p.m. Sundays (Nov. 2)
Also not screened, this family sitcom stars Bob Saget as a put-upon husband and father with neighbor problems.
`Valentine, Inc.,' 7 p.m. Sundays (Sept. 21)
A fantasy comedy-drama about a family of Greek gods working undercover to "bring love to the world." One can only imagine ... and dread.
`Easy Money,' 8 p.m. Sundays (Sept. 21)
A drama about a dysfunctional family of loan sharks. The CW describes this one as "a Dickensian tale of money and identity." Seriously. I'm not making that up. Dickens? Laurie Metcalf plays the matriarch.
`90210,' 7 p.m. Tuesdays (premiered Sept. 2)
An early arrival, this update of the iconic '90s original certainly has the requisite cast of teen hotties. Are we past adolescent angst among the rich? Maybe not. Fans of the original might hunger for more, and new teen viewers seem eager to sample. Another cult fave like "Gossip Girl?"
`Privileged,' 8 p.m. Tuesdays (Tuesday)
Another drama about rich people, this one is set in the fabulously wealthy world of Palm Beach, Fla. Anne Archer, looking lost in the superficial gloss, plays a socialite who hires a young tutor (JoAnna Garcia) to take charge of her teenage granddaughters.
`Stylista,' 8 p.m. Wednesdays (Oct. 22)
In this reality show, starry-eyed fashion wannabes compete for an editorial job at Elle magazine. Along the way they are abused by the magazine's fashion news director Anne Slowey and creative director Joe Zee. Painful to watch.
Diane Holloway writes for the Austin American-Statesman. E-mail: dholloway AT statesman.com.
